Stephanie Rivera, right, nominated St. Joseph's nurse Lilly Ferraro for the Nightingale in appreciation of her caring assistance on the night baby Jessica was born.
Teen mom grateful for nurse's compassion
May 10, 2008
Toronto Star
In her hours of need, nurse Lilly Ferraro was there – actively supporting, mentoring, showing kindness and being completely non-judgmental.
For Stephanie Rivera, who was about to deliver her first child at age 19, Ferraro's support was a godsend – coming at a time of high anxiety, overwhelming pain and the emotional stress of feeling judged because she was a pregnant teen.
"I can only hope that every other mother-to-be will have the kind of assistance she was to me," says Rivera, who had been disheartened during her pregnancy by "rudeness" and the condescending attitudes of others when she went out in public.
"I know of all the judgments passed on pregnant teens."
But Ferraro was not like that. Rivera was so moved by her experience that when she read in the Toronto Star about its Nightingale Award, she nominated Ferraro and was elated when she heard that the RN had been chosen.
"Right from the get-go, she was warm-hearted," recalls Rivera of the day she met Ferraro, 44, at St. Joseph's Health Centre. It was the afternoon of July 30, 2007 and Rivera had gone to the hospital with the baby's father, Jason Tucker, because she was one week past her delivery date and had been feeling light contractions.
It turned out she was four centimetres dilated, so she was admitted and had her water broken. Ferraro was there and told her that if she needed anything she just had to ask. Her job, she told Rivera, was to "make my labour and delivery go as smoothly as possible."
Rivera wanted a natural birth and said no to an epidural, a local anaesthetic.
It was soon to become the "most painful experience" she had ever had. But Ferraro helped by describing "beautiful and peaceful scenes that really did calm me. She breathed with me when my contractions were too painful" and suggested a warm shower that helped ease the pain. And when Tucker, who was coaching and helping in the shower, got his pants soaked, "she even managed to find another pair of pants for him," Rivera recalls.
As time went on and the pain got worse, Rivera received an epidural after seven centimetres of dilation.
"I was quite disappointed in myself but Lilly was there to assure me that I was one of her bravest patients for having gone so far without it," Rivera says.
Although Ferraro's shift ended at 11 p.m., she stayed for another two hours. "I recall that when she did leave in the wee hours of the morning, she introduced me to my new nurse. I wanted to thank her for all she did but I was not in the right state of mind to adequately express my gratitude."
At about 3 a.m. July 31, baby Jessica was born. Rivera was unable to reconnect with Ferraro, who had been working a casual shift that day in labour and delivery, away from her regular area at the hospital, the cystoscopy department, which deals with urinary bladder issues.
Ferraro, who has been an RN since graduating from Humber College in 1989, loves the department she's in now and enjoys the interaction with colleagues and patients.
"I'm a talker and I get to talk to the patients a lot ... help them get through their procedures. I'm a people person and I give 110 per cent of myself to my work. Every day ... I am so glad to be here."
A colleague in cystoscopy, nurse Maria Makowski, was delighted to hear Ferraro is this year's Nightingale recipient. She is devoted to patients and "always takes the time to answer all their questions," Makowski says. "She treats everyone with kindness and respect, young women and old men. She puts them all at ease. Lilly is someone who I would want to have as a nurse."
Ferraro worked in labour and delivery at St. Joe's for 14 years and she acknowledges it's her passion. "I absolutely love it.
"It's an amazing part of someone's life, bringing a baby into the world and sharing that joy, or sorrow, sometimes ... You share that experience with them. You never forget it," says Ferraro, who is married to Frank and has two daughters, Martina, 14, and Erika, 11.
"Every birth is incredible. There's a light that comes into the room for everyone," she says, her own face brightening as she thinks about it. "There's an excitement in labour and delivery. You never know what's going to come in the door at midnight, and I do miss that."
It can also be an emotional duty. "When babies die ... I cry, I do. I've gone to the funerals of babies that have passed away ... it's part of the caring."
For Ferraro, nursing is where she was meant to be. "I believe that this is what I was put here to do." But she admits, almost shyly, that she was totally surprised to hear she won the Nightingale Award.
"When they told me, my face got all red."